PREPARES Celebrates 10 Years of Helping Young Families
Ashleigh was 18 when she found herself pregnant. Her mother was furious at her daughter’s “stupidity”— the word she used to describe the situation. Ashleigh felt something compelling her to keep the baby. It wasn’t the father, as they didn’t even speak anymore, but there was something in her heart that knew this baby belonged. When she began showing, her mother’s criticism only grew, until Ashleigh felt she had to leave.
At 31 weeks pregnant, Ashleigh found herself couch surfing with friends. In her situation, school seemed to be the least of her worries, and she quit going. Understandably, she became overwhelmed and depressed, not knowing where to turn, and knowing that the baby’s birth was not far off.
Creating a Plan to Help
Providing support for all pregnant mothers and young families in Washington State has been the goal of PREPARES since its inception in 2014. An initiative of the Bishops of Washington State, led by Bishop Joseph Tyson, the aim was to create a ministry that would support any pregnant woman or new family. “Our ultimate goal,” Bishop Tyson explains, “is to make sure that no child, born or unborn, is abandoned or alone. We want to make sure that every mother and father, whether in a rural area or a large urban setting, has a community of caring people around them, walking those first five critical years of life.”
The PREPARES model was developed specifically to deliver support to struggling new mothers and families. Receiving diapers, clothing, and assistance with connecting to community resources is essential for many PREPARES mothers, especially those who may be many miles from family. Most PREPARES families manage on very little income, and struggle to pay for rent, electricity, groceries, and other daily necessities. PREPARES volunteers provide diapers and wipes to families, as well as information on rental assistance, food banks, medical care, and other needed resources.
The PREPARES ministry goes beyond the provision of physical items and community resource information. Each mother participating in PREPARES is offered a family companion to provide a listening ear and non-judgmental support. These caring companions—who are all volunteers—create warm connections and offer a sense of family to mothers and fathers who may feel very alone.
Ashleigh was just four weeks from her due date when the mother of a friend suggested she contact her parish’s PREPARES ministry. She gave Ashleigh the phone number of PREPARES and within the week, Ashleigh had met with Lisa, her new companion. Lisa provided Ashleigh with information on housing for young adults and helped her register with the local hospital for the impending birth. The following week, Lisa began rounding up newborn clothing and items, and even found a bassinet. While frightened of the birth, Ashleigh began to see a little light at the end of the tunnel. She even reached out to her mother and told her how much she missed her.
Ministry Growth
In 2015, the Yakima Diocese had just five volunteers serving more than 300 families. Today, there are 260 PREPARES volunteers in 35 parishes. An additional four parishes in the Spokane Diocese are also served through Central Washington PREPARES.
A Journey Together
The volunteer family companions are the ones who have risen to the occasion. Each has felt the call to help new mothers and young families; many remembering their own early parenting experiences. Companions receive training, where each builds a “tool kit” of resources that help them build relationships with women and families who may live very different lives from themselves.
One companion explained, “Initially, I felt a bit different from the moms I was companioning. I don’t worry about where my next meal will come from, or whether I can pay my rent, but several of my mamas do. Once we talk, we have so much in common! From family struggles, to missing loved ones, to being uncertain that we are doing the very best for our babies. I can vividly remember my own young-mother self, experiencing the very same challenges. We are on this journey of life together.”
While putting away the dishes and silverware Lisa’s parish had gifted her, Ashleigh felt the first real contraction of labor. Panicked, she called Lisa. Ten minutes later, Lisa picked her up, and they drove to the hospital. As the labor became more challenging, Ashleigh openly cried. “I can’t do this! Don’t leave me!” she begged. Lisa squeezed Ashleigh’s hand and wiped at her tears. “I’m not going anywhere,” she reassured. “And you CAN do this. You’re going to do great!”
With Lisa’s comforting presence, Ashleigh delivered a healthy 7 lb., 1oz. baby girl. She called her mother, who immediately came to see her daughter and new granddaughter, Mia. Ashleigh and her mother’s slow healing process began that day.
Two years later, Ashleigh is working as a childcare assistant at a childcare center and is slowly saving for college. She hopes to become a teacher one day. Lisa meets up with Ashleigh consistently, and continues to bring diapers, though Mia is almost potty trained. Most of their conversations now are around Mia’s development, Ashleigh’s dreams and plans, and what she needs to do to move toward those goals. Lisa treasures her time spent with Ashleigh and Mia. “I believe we are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus,” she says. Being a PREPARES companion for Ashleigh and Mia allows me to answer the call.”
If not for the volunteers, parishes, PREPARES teams, and donors, we could not bring this meaningful, life-changing support to the thousands of families we serve through PREPARES.
